I want to take some time here to talk about what breast cancer really means to a woman. We women define ourselves by our hair and our breasts. It is what we subconsciously think of that makes us women. Yes, I know we are much more than hair and breasts, but telling that to your heart while you look in the mirror at your destroyed body…. the heart doesn’t always listen. I have made it my goal to be as upbeat as possible for my family. This disease scares them and I am Mom, its my job to protect. Its a habit that will not go away.
However, alone in the bathroom, looking at myself destroys you emotionally. You just get good at hiding it. Putting on a brave smile, acting like its just rolling off your back and you have it all under control.
I see the ads about breast cancer, these healthy whole women and the pretty pink ribbon. I appreciate the sympathy, and the effort. But that is not cancer.
Cancer is drain tubes, scars, swelling, bruising, tired and hurting. Cancer is a self esteem that hurts no matter what you lead other people to believe. Cancer is anger- why me! Cancer is crying, withdrawing from people, sleeping to avoid it all. I’m sorry CANCER IS NOT A PRETTY PINK RIBBON.
I share with you what cancer looks like to me….