1st Chemo Treatment 10/19


Ok, yes I am terrified. People get sick and die from chemotherapy. Isn’t this supposed to help me not die from cancer? This is a pretty screwed up system. Its a hard pill for me to swallow that we can clone animals, make artificial internal organs, so many medical advances… but chemo is still how we treat cancer. For the life of me it will never make sense.

My chemo cocktail will start with anti-nausea meds first, then I will get Cytoxan and then Taxotere. I was told I would go home with the Neulasta that will give me an auto shot 24 hours after chemo to boost my white blood cell production.

As I sit in a very crowded infusion room there are people here from all walks of life. Thankfully I do not see any young people. Middle age to elderly is the normal from what I see.

My infusion does not begin until 1:25 pm. They tell me the chemo is not mixed by their pharmacist until you are present and in your chair waiting. I guess I can understand as they say the mixtures are tailored to each person. Guess what, my insurance approved the chemo treatment but NOT the Neulasta. They said it had to come through one of their preferred providers (pharmacy). So no white blood cell boosting for me. They said they are working on it to try to have it at the next treatment. I am a little pissed. It’s not the doctor or office’s fault. Its all the insurance company. I feel they are so crooked much of the time. I asked could I pay cash for it? I though a few hundred dollars but it would be worth it not to get deathly ill and end up in the hospital. The technician said $20,000. SAY WHAT! Ok, now I am pissed at the drug companies too! There is no way it should be that expensive for one shot.

I had brought a book, a blanket and my cell phone to try to entertain myself. I had my son drop me off. There was no sense in him waiting in the lobby all day.

Chemo is BORING. The have TVs but I don’t watch soap operas. You are sitting in a type of recliner but your bottom still gets sore from sitting there all day. I should have brought lunch. My treatment was over at 4:45 pm. That was ALL DAY. My cell had went almost dead. I got bored with the book and I was unable to fall asleep to take a nap. I think I will prepare better next time.

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  1. It hurts me that you are having to go through this. You are a brave, strong woman who will beat cancer’s ass! Love you.


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